I could not only, see and feel everything from the North Pole to the South Pole, but even beyond the galaxy. A fusion of past, present and the future in raw format appeared. It was like looking at my own biography as a film of magnificent colours. I always wanted to write my biography. It is now being screened in front of my own eyes. Frame by frame, scene by scene the unedited version of my own biography directed by experts, with real players for my own eyes is being screened in 4D. I am being forced to see this film with no emotions and no criticism for real bitter truth is being unfolded.
My dad walked towards me. He did not notice me and had no distinct features and looked like a stranger. His own driver was stabbing him to death. Blood spurted out of his body. A naked woman stood behind the murderer. She was laughing profusely with sarcasm covering her face. They stepped over my dad's still body covered with blood and walked away hand in hand. At a distance all alone my mother wept. Was she weeping at the loss or did emotion mixed with relief made her weep. My dad who demanded respect instead of earning it is gone. Living his own life the way he wanted with total disregard for others including his own family, he was almost a stranger at home. I felt as if it was good riddance for he destroyed the family life of his own driver as well as ours.
My young days under the roof of my stepmother flashed before me. Playing and studying with my stepmother's children, I lost memory of my own family. Growing along with my stepbrothers and stepsisters, I could feel my own blood boiling inside me. It was the same as that spurted out of my father's body. I was demanding respect and never earned it. I needed no revenge from the driver who killed my dad for he had good reasons to do that. But I wanted to be different. Jealousy and betrayal engulfed every cell in my body.
I looked out for company different from others. I felt being surrounded by people who looked much darker than the others. Whether they were darker by looks or by their ways I did not know. They drew me into them for I was darker than others. I felt relieved in the company of dark people. But the relief was not long-lived. Soon I started to hate them. My real self-started to haunt me. But it was too late. They were like the tentacles of an octopus. They invaded each and every part of my body.
I saw some invasion. It was inevitable and welcome at the start but soon became cancerous. They ached my body and burnt every muscle. They are part of my own body. Yet they behaved as if they were not. Even if I wanted to, I could not get rid of them. They were demanding and eating into each part of my body. Then a blind dog appeared wagging his tail and licking me. He was not demanding. He loved me unconditionally. I felt as if he is my body partner.
I sought solace in liquor and was becoming an addict. In front of my own eyes, I was in a trance. Nothing mattered. Being not aware of the outside world, my family and friends, I was drowning in liquor. A white angel hovered above me. He showered me with money and visions to be realized. I was struggling to reach the targets but the invasions of my body held me back. The angel of trust and friendship was extremely demanding. I felt myself being overcome with callousness. The devil of callous thoughts engulfed me. Seeing no way out of the situation I betrayed the angle of trust and friendship.
Few dead bodies floated in the sky. The smiles on their faces were filled with mockery. I could not avoid them banging on my floating body. However much I tried to avoid them it was a futile effort. I felt a barrage of complaints from the dead bodies. I was helpless. I could not defend myself. They were the people whose lives were destroyed by my betrayals.
I saw money coming towards me through trust, friendship and the sweat of people who worked for me. I enjoyed betraying them. I raised my hands and the friends who helped me turned into ashes. Below me, their families were cursing and my heart ached and eardrums burst. They were not calling for my blood. They wanted me to live and suffer so that they can see the punishments.
A huge gate appeared with my long forgotten friend at the gate dressed in pure white. His face was filled with sympathy. I was floating towards the gate when suddenly he stopped me and whispered in my ear.
“ You are too early. Go back and fulfil your obligations. Clean all the sweat shed by others for you. Your suffering is not over yet” He pushed me back with a huge force. I was sliding back through the tunnel.
A sudden jerk woke me up in a hospital bed with doctors and nurses in attendance. I overheard the surgeon saying, “ The bullet missed the heart by an inch”
A nurse replied “ the gun had come from his own collection”
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